There are several levels of broken promises that cause different reactions in different people. Some may be potential deal breakers, such as repeated addictive leaks, infidelity or something else that is hidden from the other partner and could risk their consent if known. If these breaches of trust are repeated, many intimate relationships simply cannot survive. If you and/or your partner haven`t been very good at keeping your promises so far, make it the goal to improve yourself. Ideally, you can work on it together, but even if you`re just working on changing yourself, you`ll likely see improvements in your spouse and relationship as well. If you`re like most people, sticking to your agreements is something you want to do and intend to do it. You work hard to deliver what you promised. You want people to know that they can count on you and trust you. Your excellent communication and hearing skills allow you to move away from social norms and detach yourself from patterns that put your decision-making skills in a drawer. It will also open you up to different perspectives, so you can identify the signs of reparation for strained relationships. Work together while respecting the needs of both people. It doesn`t mean games, scores, or grudges.
Accept that conflict is inevitable when two people work closely together and master them as a unit. Maintain an atmosphere of security, trust and respect in your relationship. If you don`t keep your word, your spouse says you don`t care if it`s true or not. It makes your spouse feel unpopular or unimportant, as if it`s not worth it, and it probably makes you bad too. The problem is that healthy relationships aren`t really automatic. Staying on track, being authentic, transparent and compassionate (among other qualities) requires commitment. It takes determination – ourselves and our partner, promising that we will not just bring the relationship to the coast, but that we actively nurture it. This undoubtedly requires patience. There are differences and accepts that there are disagreements. Cooperate, compromise and agree to disagree.
Take advantage of conflicts to learn something about yourself and your partner. Remember that it won`t always be perfect. When everything is said and done, healthy relationships require effort to maintain them. Set and honor healthy boundaries. Stay flexible instead of viewing situations as all or nothing. Manage your emotions as best you can and offer your partner the encouragement and support they need to do the same. Take a minute to reflect on these last few days. How many agreements have you broken with yourself or with others? How many of these agreements did you know or suspect they were breaking? Wondering why you violated the agreements – or let them know you couldn`t keep your word? With this simple three-question exercise, you can determine what is undermining your ability to stick to agreements, such as your self-confidence and self-esteem. A strong team starts with you. Sticking to your agreements builds your self-confidence and personal strength.
Most importantly, it shows your members that you are someone you can rely on 100%. For those who have to commit too much and then break their chords, a big part of what drives them to live this way is not only to follow the stimulation and satisfaction that comes from participating in exciting projects, but the process of doing so allows them to isolate themselves from the shame of inadequacy and inferiority. . . .